When sacred duty calls

People call me "pastor." I haven't mentioned this on the blog before because I have mixed feelings about it. On the one hand, I feel the title of pastor has so many burdensome connotations: seminarian, salaried, and under a denominational thumb. None of those apply to me. Of course, none of those words apply to my pastor either. But on the other hand, I feel honored to take up the role of the pastor as laid out in the Bible: a servant leader who cares for God's flock.

A little history is proper at this point ...

I led a small house church in Washington, D.C., for a few years, even though it certainly wasn't a one-man show. None of us were paid. Our congregation never grew to more than 20 and we stopped meeting after people decided to go to other churches or moved away for various reasons. Even though there were tough episodes, I consider my time as a pastor an unqualified blessing. We had the opportunity to preach the gospel to scores of Chinese researchers who were working at the National Institutes of Health and had never heard the Christian message before. Most of our congregation was made up of really smart Chinese PhDs who were older than me.

Anyway, I decided to move back to Seattle late last year and rejoin my home church. Frankly, my spiritual life was at a low ebb and with the church also weak, it seemed a better overall decision for me to head back. People still call me "pastor" here in Seattle out of respect, even though I was never called that in D.C. nor sought that honor.

So when my pastor asked me about my plans for future ministry last night, the subplot was, "Do you still want to be as active as before?" Without hesitation, I answered that I would try to meet any need in the church. That talk stirred something inside me. I truly feel a "burden" to do God's work, just as Jesus said His food was to do the will of the Father and finish His work. Whatever is necessary, I want to say "Yes, here I am. Send me."

Also, my pastor asked me to preach on Jan. 22. Our congregation in Seattle is about 250, so it's an intimidating request, but I'll give it a try. Most likely, regular readers of this blog will be familiar with some of the things I'll mention. Our church website has streaming audio of the previous week's sermon, so you should have a chance to listen.